I probably should be practicing or studying

A - Available: Yes - Age: 19 - Annoyance: nuts in cookies and/or brownies

B - Beer: It's growing on me - Birthday: February 2 - Best Friend: Don't make me pick one. - Body Part on opposite sex: Eyes - Best feeling in the world: Love - Blind or Deaf: Blind - Best weather: cold and slightly windy - Been in Love: not yet - Been on stage: yes, and will be for the rest of my life - Believe in Magic: keeping the possibility open - Believe in Santa: yes. I mus

C - Candy: Skittles - Color: Blue - Chocolate/Vanilla: Chocolate - Chinese/Mexican Food: Chinese - Cake or pie: Cake - Continent to visit: Europe - Cheese: Cheddar?

D - Day or Night: Night. - Dancing in the rain: sounds fun, and romantic at the right moment E - Eyes: help me see - Everyone's got: their own life - Ever failed a class?: not yet! F - First thoughts waking up: Can I go back to sleep, please? - Favorite Food: chocolate G - Greatest Fear: not finding love and/or not finding/achieving success - Goals: finding love, achieving success - Gum: orbit - Get along with your parents?: for the most part H - Hair Color: brown - Height: 5’8'' - Happy: yeah, but i can think of ways it can be improved - Holiday: Christmas - How do you want to die: in my sleep or just really quick and painless I - Ice Cream: chocolate chip cookie dough - Instrument: voice (I say that at Loyola, so I can say that here) J - Jewelry: my best friends forever anklet - Job: student, former waiter, and performer K - Kids: eventualy - Kickboxing or karate: karate - Keep a journal?: I did. Now I blog. L - Love: yes, please - Letter: Um... S? J? L? Idk - Laughed so hard you cried: a few times M - Milk flavor: whole white milk - Movies: I enjoy them - Motion sickness? no - McD’s or BK: McD's, but I enjoy the occasional BK N - Number: 22 O - One wish: love and achieving my dreams P - Perfect Pizza: cheese, pineapple, canadian bacon - Pepsi/Coke: Coke Q - Quail: what? R - Reason to cry: being hurt or extremely happy - Reality T.V.: getting old - Radio Station: B97 - Roll your tongue in a circle: I haven't really tried - Ring size: 8-ish, i think S - Song: Flight by Sutton Foster and Megan McGinnis (right now) - Shoe size: 9.5-10 - Salad Dressing: Ranch - Sushi: Crunchy and Snow Crab rolls - Skinny dipped?: haha yes. - Strawberries/Blueberries: Strawberries T - Tattoos?: maybe. - Time for bed: depends on the day I've had and how early I have to get up the next day - Thunderstorms: nice to sleep through U - Unpredictable: It happens on occasion V - Vacation spot(s): New York City, Paris, Greece, Italy, France, Spain W - Weakness: it happens - Which one of your friends acts the most like you: Blythe and Katie - Who makes you laugh the most: hard to say - Worst feeling: sadness - Wanted to be a model: it crossed my mind once, but no - Worst Weather?: really hot and humid weather X - X-Rays: on my foot. twice. same foot. Y - Year it is now: 2009 - Yellow: my shirt is yellow! Z - Zoo animal: monkeys! LAST PERSON WHO… 1. Slept in a bed beside you? Dani and Kaleb 2. You went to the mall with? Blythe, Amy, and Katie 3. You went to dinner with? My sisters 4. You talked to on the phone? Blythe 5. Made you laugh? Miki 6. Hugged you? Monica 7. Said they loved you? Mom 8. Held your hand? Katie 9. You spoke with? Katie 10.You cried over? uhh.....? YOUR TURN!!! *tags* you're it.

"Wait! Remember this emotion."

Just felt the urge to blog. It was like a lightning bolt had hit me and told me to blog.

I have not done a legit show in over 9 months. It is killing me. I don't know that I will be able to do a show for another couple months. I don't think I'm doing Children of Eden because none of my friends are doing it. Most of them are doing Lil' Abner with River Region. I don't know that I can wait until July (or something like that) to do a show. I think Michael Lynn is doing Little Shop of Horrors, but I heard that he has already cast it. So there is no chance of me auditioning for it. Also, I think he is doing Into the Woods. That I know I can do and I have a good chance of getting a part (I hope I'm not wrong in assuming so), but I am not sure I can wait that long without busting (or bursting for those English grammar nuts), dying, crying myself to sleep for about a month, etc. I know I sound kind of overdramatic, but I am so serious. I am in such of a need for a show that can work with my schedule that I was singing through a song, and I cried. Yes, the song might have called for it but not in a practice room. I didn't attempt it. I just happened. There was no effort put into it. Maybe I just need a chance to just get everything out of my system, and I feel the only way to do that is to sing some really big, belt-y, emotional (happy or sad) song. Or maybe I just need an emotional cleansing and should just cry. Or maybe I'm just over-stressed because of all the papers I have to write, finals coming up, and the preparations for juries.

Another reason for my jolt. I feel like I am settling again. Education is not performing. Education is not musical theater. Education is my backup. Education is not my main goal. Why is it that my friends can go off and do what they love, but I cannot. Don't get me wrong, I love where I am and (for the most part) what I'm doing. I just feel like I am not doing this for myself. I know that in my heart I am doing this for my family. It took so much energy to get my parents to be okay with changing my major to education. I don't know that they will ever be okay with perform as my career choice. [I wonder what's going to happen when I come out to them.] Fucking hypocritical. They say they support me, but they don't really want me to do it. Then I prove to them I am good enough and that I can do it, and then it fades away. Then I prove myself again. It's like an endless cycle. I know I sometimes lack the determination to get what I want or to do what I want. I need a push because I take that push and I run with it. My parents gave me the push to really get into musical theater by making me join Summer Stages, and I fucking ran with it: it's been 10 years and I want to do musical theater for the rest of my life. I guess they kind of regret that push.

I kind of feel like I'm being left behind. I find that people around me are growing and moving on, and I am just staying in one place not doing anything. I was talking to Courtney earlier, and she has finally figured out how to get where she wants to go. She's actually working on getting things together so she can do it. Then there's Monique. Monique blew me away in Fame! I knew she could sing. I knew she could dance. I knew she could act. But damn! This was her best yet. Every time I think about the show, I think about her belting her ass off in "There She Goes/Fame" or the emotion she gives to "In LA" where her belting is even bigger and better (if you can believe it is possible). That girl is going places. I've told her, and she knows this. I just can't believe she is going to Oklahoma next year to grow even more. I don't know what I'm going to do without her. Then there's all of the graduating NOCCA kids with whom I have grown up and performed. They are all moving on, growing up, getting better, and going places. Why do I feel so left behind? Why didn't I feel this way last semester when I graduated?!

Also, being single is getting to me again. There were 2 separate occasions this weekend that I had my being single thrown in my face. #1. We went to the Howling Wolf to see Blythe's brother's band play.  Standing right next to us are, of course, a drunk couple holding each other and making out. A lot. #2. Tucks was way crowded, and we are standing around drinking and right next to us is a couple drunkenly dancing and making out. OK, UNIVERSE! I GET IT! I'M SINGLE! NO NEED TO SHOVE IT IN MY FACE!!

I'm at that point where I am going to jump on the bandwagon and say "FML." But I resist.

"Wait! Remember this emotion." - 5 points for the show this quote is from. (See! I am such a musical theater nerd. I am made for this business!)

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I've noticed I tend to post videos of women, so I'm breaking that habit now. 

This video I got from Andrew Keenan-Bloger's blog. I'm just going to copy and paste what he said. "Three of my favorite boys from POPPINS, Nick Sanchez, Clark Johnsen & Justin Keyes (yes, that Justin Keyes, we're on tour with each other again!) were fooling around over dinner break and came up with this. They are so stupid/brilliant. I smell a series of youtube videos coming." I believe they are singing a song from Children of Eden.

 This is Adam Lambert performing One Republic's "Come Home" at Upright Cabaret's 2nd annual New Year's Eve Blowout on New Years Eve 2008. Now I'm not a follow of American Idol any more, so I'm not really following Adam. Fortunately, BroadwayWorld is following him and is posting videos of him before American Idol. This performance is so emotional and vocally amazing (but a little overdramatic). Great combo, nonetheless, and great performance.

 

This last video I got from AKB. It is Morgan James, Jake Wilson, Jessica Hershberg and Alysha Umphress performing Britney Spear's "If U Seek Amy" at SUNDAY NiGHT LIVE, a Season 2 Fundraiser for THE BATTERY'S DOWN at Joe's Pub. All of these performers are amazing, but I have to point 2 of them out. First is Alysha Umphress, all the way to the right. Her comedic timing and interpretation is wonderful perfection. Also, her riffs are pretty cool. Last is Morgan James, the blonde all the way to the left. She is beasting up a storm with the crazy high notes and riffs!!  I think these too could give me some lessons on how to riff it out in a classy way. The song is pretty chill compared to Britney's original, but it is still soo good!

BAM!!

Bored in the library

95 New Questions You’ve Probably Never Been Asked!

1. First thing you wash in the shower? 
Hair

2. What color is your favorite hoodie?
Blue

3. Do you like coffee? 
Nope.

5. How are you feeling RIGHT now?
Chill, feeling a bit down but only because I'm listening to "Next to Normal"

6. What’s the last letter of your crush’s name?
If I had 1 main crush, I'd give it to you.

7. Do you say aim or a-i-m? 
aim

8. Tell me about the last dream you remember having. 
It was 2 parts. Part 2: I was chasing after a small (about the size of my hand), poisonous and deadly spider with a gun. I shot it a couple times, but it was never effected. That's about it.

9. Could you eat your favourite food everyday for a month and not get sick of it?
Yes. Of course.

10. What are you craving? 

My blueberry scone sitting a few inches away from me.

11. Do you floss?
Sadly, not much.

12. What comes to mind when I say cabbage? 

Ew and New Years.

16. Have you ever counted to 1,000? 
I think I've tried as a child, but never succeeded.

17. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it? 
Both

18. Do you use smileys? 
Not a lot, but yeah.

19. How many bedrooms are in your house? 
4. Well, 5 if you count the appartment.

20. Have you ever met a celebrity? 
Broadway celebrity, yes.

21. Do you like cottage cheese? 
Um. No.

22. What’s the last song you had stuck in your head? 
"I Hmm You" from EDGES

23. How many countries have you visited? 
None. Been here my whole life.

24. Are your parents strict?
To some extent. They let me have parties. What do you think?

25. Would you go sky diving? 
Sure. One day.

26. Would you go out to eat with George W. Bush? 
Maybe? 

28. Is there anything sparkly in the room you’re in? 
Yeah. The light reflecting in the window.

30. Do you rent movies?
No. My family buys movies.

31. Who sits in front of you in your math class? 
No more math classes!!! Yeah!!

35. Where are you going to be Saturday night? 
Drinking somewhere?

36. Brown or white eggs?
White, but I don't see the difference.

37. Like rap music? 
Some of it. i'm not a huge fan, but I like it when I'm drinking

38. Ever taken a train? 
Yeah, but not to a specific destination.

39. Experienced the twin towers falling in New York? 
I was at school.

41. What day of the week is it? 
Tuesday night.

40. What was your lunch today?

Salad, some kind of pasta, and Sprite!

43. What is your best friend doing tomorrow?
Going to class.

46. Have you ever seen The Butterfly Effect? 
Yeah. It was ok.

47. So, how about them Yankees? 
What about them?

51. Is your hair curly? 
It's kind of wavy. It has 1 flippy thing in the front. Does that count as curly?

52. Last time you cried? 
Watching the DVD of RENT's final Live show on Broadway. I think. 

53. Ever walked into a wall? 
Yeah.

55. Have you ever bought anything from PacSun? 
Once, I think.

56. Favorite season? 
Winter

61. The next person you’ll hold hands with? 
Blythe or Miki. Probably Miki.

62. Do you sleep with the TV on? 
Not anymore.

63. Have you ever drank alcohol straight from the bottle? 
Hahahaha. Yes.

64. Do you think you’re old? 
Sometimes. Depends on who hanging out with at the moment.

65. Are you afraid of the dark? 
Nope.

66. Do you like your life right now? 
Yeah. Life is pretty good right now. 

67. When’s the last time you chose a bath over a shower? 
Years ago.

68. Do you knock on wood? 
Every so often.

69. Do you have good vision? 
When I'm wearing my contacts or glasses

70. Can you hula hoop? 
Yep

71. Where are your parents? 
At home, I guess.

72. Have you ever kissed in an elevator? 
No?

73. What is the next CD you will buy? 
West Side Story OBC or the New Broadway Cast Recording of Hair

74. What brands are you wearing? 
American Eagle, 5-star, Sperry, and some unknown Salem, Mass. souvenir t-shirt maker.

76. Have you ever crawled through a window? 
Yes, to break back into my grandmother's house when I was little enough to get through the small window.

77. Can you handle the truth? 
Yes.

78. What was the most recent thing you bought? 
Iced tea and a blueberry scone from CC's

79. How often do you talk on the phone? 
Not a whole lot.

80. Are you in a complicated relationship? 
I'd have to be in a relationship for it to be complicated.

81. Do you hate more than 3 people? 
Maybe. I don't count the number of people I hate.

82. Have you ever tripped someone?
Haha. Yeah. Not recently, though.

86. Do you use chap stick? 
Yes.

87. Are you too forgiving? 
Sometimes?

88. Do you own something from Hot Topic? 
Hahaha. Yes. Oh, if you only knew what it was.

89. Do you own a gun? 
My family does. I do not.

90. Have you made a prank phone call? 
Oh I miss my childhood.

91. Have you ever been in a castle? 
No. I've tried to make my own & failed.

92. Do you like your hair? 
Sometimes too much.

93. Do you like yourself? 
Yeah. I'm happy how I turned out.

94. Are you closer to your mother or father? 
Mom. No doubt.

95. Do you chat on AIM often? 
Not a lot, but yes

"It really blows my mind..."

Yes, I realized that I am kind of following the pack by blogging again, but believe me. I really have meant to blog for a few days.

No, my point here is not to talk about mind-blowing sex. That would be great to talk about.... if I had had some mind-blowing sex, well sex in general. When I say mind-blowing I mean, something that is so great, so odd, or so (for a lack of a better term) mind-blowing that it hits you in some way, shape, or form. The picture that comes to my mind is a fan being blown in a man's face at a really high speed so that it blows his brains clean. Random and a little weird.

Here are some things that blow my mind:

-High notes and belting. A mixture of both is even better (if done well). Also, hot people who can sing. Omg. I melt.

-Seth Rudetsky's deconstruction vlogs are so amazing (aka mind-blowing). I listen to various amazing excepts from various shows, and I learn so much about performers, little inside information about shows, and how to belt. Is it bad to think of myself as a mini-Seth Rudetsky in training? Ask any of my friends, I know so much random stuff about Broadway shows and songs. I think I might make deconstruction video. I will! I'll do it! Now, to decide what songs to choose or a theme help the song choosing process. Oh god, this is going to be harder than I thought.

-The way the mind works. How does the mind decide who it likes and what people it likes more? How do some of your thoughts come about? Why can't you make the mind stop thinking about something or someone? Actually, all of this could probably go the same for heart. Why does the mind have roadblocks for the body (aka inhibitions)? Why does it take alcohol to break through those roadblocks?  Why does the mind sometimes not agree with the heart? Why do you sometimes not know what you want? Do dreams really reveal what's going on in your subliminal mind? How do you figure out what your dreams mean? Why can't somebody be the best person they know that they are inside all of the time? If it is possible, why must it be so difficult to do?

- The idea of achieving one's life goals.

-Mind blowing sex. Hahah. Just kidding. Well, kind of.

That's all I have for now. I want to try blogging 30 times in 30 days. I've been thinking of doing in May, but I don't want it to mess with my studying for finals. Maybe I should start now? What do you think? 

Oh, does anyone know where the quote from the blog title came from? I will give 10 points to the first to get it right.

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This video is of Nikki Snelson (Brooke Windham from Legally Blonde) as Cassie performing "The Music and the Mirror" from the national tour of A Chorus Line. This video kind of sealed my decision to possibly audition for some Broadway show national tours before I try to make it in New York or even Chicago. Also, this makes me want to be an amazing dancer, like a pro. Unfortunately, I cannot embed the video here, so you will have to go to the youtube website through the link HERE.

Matt turned me on to this next video. This is Patti Labelle singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" at a tribute to Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. One of my favorite parts of this is when she kind of "crumps" after she belts a really high note. It's hilarious and oh so good!

This is  Jennifer Damiano (Her high notes come so freaking easy. It's amazing!), Aaron Tveit (He is so hot, and so freaking talented!), and Alice Ripley (Fierce!) singing "Superboy and the Invisible Girl" from Broadway's newest original musical, Next to Normal. I recently bought the cast recording, and this is one of the best songs from the show, but the whole show is amazing! Actually, Alice Ripley, Aaron Tveit, and the show as a whole won a local awards in Washington D.C. Also, I just found out the show opens on Broadway today. So here's to a great Broadway opening Next to Normal!

BAM!!

Home for the holidays

I'm home for spring break! Yay for spring break!!! Ehh... for being home. Belle Chasse does not compare to uptown New Orleans, downtown New Orleans or even any other part of New Orleans. I feel like Reese Witherspoon in Sweet Home Alabama. [I know it's kind of a gay reference, but there's a point to it]. How can any sane person go from the amazing New York City to you rural hometown? It's like a HUGE step down. I have been to my local grocery store twice, and it is stereotypical: pickup trucks in the parking lot, country music playing in the background, "butterface" bag boys. I don't like it. My brother can build a house here, I am meant to be in the city. I don't know if it is specifically meant to be New Orleans, but I know city life is for me. Being on the optimistic side of life, I have to say being home has it's perks.

Pro's: my own room and bathroom, more privacy (which is semi-debatable), not being woken up by my roommate, no other semi-roommates keeping me up later than I want to be, my family, my parents paying for everything, home-cooked meals, being more productive than I am at school.

Con's: mom constantly asking "Where are you?", rural life, running into people who know me only by my family's association, most of my friends are gone, traveling to see my friends, being on the internet more than I should be, boredom.

Ok. Enough of Belle Chasse. I went to visit a rehearsal of FAME at Dominican. The stage and the rehearsal process look a little different, but they are looking good. I am so excited to see it!!! Oddly enough, FAME is being remade, and it looks pretty good. I think I might go see the next excuse to make a money by turning a musical into a movie.

Oh. So in my spare boredom time at home, I watched the ending of one of my favorite movies from when I was a teenager. Watching it again made me realize how bad it really is, but that doesn't really stop me from enjoying it. So this should explain why I posted some videos from the movie. It has some really good singers and performances.

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Kirsten Dunst singing "Dream of Me" from Get Over It. Who knew Kirsten Dunst could sing? I didn't. It's a nice surprise. Backstory: They are putting on a musical version of Shakespeare's A Midsummer Night's Dream. Kirsten's character is playing Helena, who is in love with Demetrius (the blonde guy who is in all of the clips of the montage). Kristen's character also wrote the song for this scene. OK. Enjoy!

Sisqo and Vitamin C [a little random, right?] with the cast of Get Over It singing "September." This happens as the credits roll by. This is a good song-and-dance sequence. Just fun entertainment. 

Ok. For something a little more normal for my blogs. This is Shoshana singing "I Believe in Love" from HAIR. She originally did this for the Actor's Fund and Donor Benefit. You should watch Seth Rudetsky's deconstruction of the original recording of this song and Shoshana's version. Omg. So amazing! This girl is one of the best out there!

BAM!!